March 5, 2012

So Taylor Kitsch Never Went to the Philippines

Is geography really a hard subject? Indonesia is in Asia, so might as well call it Philippines, right Taylor Kitsch?

Taylor Kitsch went on the Late Show with David Lettermen to promote his surefire box-office bomb of a movie John Carter and relayed a story about how corruption touched his life in some godforsaken third world country when all he wanted to do was shoot some movie to entertain the world. Kitsch's story of hardship goes that customs officials of a country called the Philippines refused him entry and ask him for an iPhone.

Didn't the dumbass once glanced at his passport to see what country was stamped on it? If he bothered to look he would have seen Indonesia, not Philippines. That's right. Dumbass was never in our country. The Oliver Stone movie dumbass was shooting was in Indonesia.

I knew the second I heard of this story that there's not a speck of truth in it. Either someone is lying or being geographically challenged. Even if it's only Taylor Kitsch's left bicep that set foot in Philippine soil, we would have heard of it because the media would be all over it. I give you Bourne Legacy as an ehemplo. I got sick of hearing about Jeremy Renner and Rachel Weiss coming to the Philippines even before they made commuting here even more horrendous.

Okay, it's not like this kind of thing doesn't happen at our airports. However, it always suck when you're being accused of doing something when you're so far from the scene of the crime, so to speak. Also, how stupid is that? I can't fathom, really.

You know, this is a reason for me to stay away from John Carter when it shows here in the Philippines. And I was so looking forward to another IMAX experience. I predict that John Carter will go the way of Waterworld. Big budget, major bomb at the movie tills.

But of course, even if John Carter bombs, I don't believe this will be the end of Taylor Kitsch's movie career. Taylor Kitsch not being the brightest bulb in the box will not spell his doom. After all, beauty overcomes stupidity.