June 30, 2010

Everybody Was There Except James Yap



The presence of everybody from celebrities to foreign dignitaries at the inaugural of our 15th president, Noynoy Aquino, failed to gloss over the absence of basketball star James Yap, the soon-to-be-ex-husband? of presidential sister Kris Aquino.

Kris Aquino, wearing a Filipiana-inspired yellow gown by designer Paul Cabral, attended the inaugural with her two sons from different fathers, Baby James and Joshua, with their respective yayas in tow.

Prior to Kris's national announcement that she's had it with her husband, James was all set to go on the inauguration of his brother-in-law, Noynoy.

Now that Kris has opened her mouth, along with her family's dirty linen (once again), what is left but for James to skip the event. Honga naman. Baka isnabin pa siya dun ni Kris.

Reporters have been after James Yap to get his side of the marital split. But he has either decided to keep mum about it to keep the peace (whatever is left of it) or he is aware that he is not articulate and so decided to keep his mouth shut (which is very much suspect).

I thought these two were doomed from the start. I'm not referring to the obvious gulf-wide gap between the couple in terms of personality, intellect and upbringing. I'm talking about the fact that one is an ATTENTION SLUT and the other is just a plain MAN-SLUT.

The latest in this saga is that James has finally spoken: "It's final, ipaglalaban ko ang pagsasama ng pamilya natin." Yeah, we haven't heard the last of the Aquino-Yap melodrama since Kris will answer. She won't be able to help herself.

President Noynoy Aquino's Inaugural: The Musical Show



Many of our most popular and talented artists came together to celebrate the inauguration of the 15th president of the Republic of the Philippines, Noynoy Aquino, at the Luneta Grandstand.

International singing sensation, Charice Pempengco, sang the national anthem "LUPANG HINIRANG" in a fast tempo that we hope satisfies the old guards at the National Historical commission.

Charice will stay in the country for the three days before flying to the US to undergo vocal training for her much-awaited stint in the popular musical comedy GLEE.

The Philippine madrigal Singers sang the patriotic song BAYAN KO, followed by Ryan Cayabyab conducting "Sasabihin mo ikaw ay Pilipino with the Philippine Philharmonic Orchestra.

The retired trio of Buboy Garovillo, Danny Javier and Jim Paredes, known as the Apo Hiking Society reunited to entertain the throng with "MINAMAHAL KONG BAYAN."
Christian Bautista, who is super sikat in Indonesia, sang You Raise Me up acapella, or was that just me?

Ogie Alcasid performed "Si Noynoy" before songbird Regine Velasquez sang the campaign jingle "Di Ka Nag-iisa," first heard on TV via a star-studded music video.

Ogie Alcasid, Noel Cabangon, Jed Madela, Mae Paner (kilala rin bilang si Juana Change), Gary Valenciano, Jim Paredes at Regine Velasquez took the stage to sing the inaugural song "Bagong Pilipinas."

Before the 12 nn oath taking, Noel Cabangon held a mini-concert, singing three successive songs "Tungo sa Pagbabago, Para sa Pagbabago," "Ako'y Isang Mabuting Pilipino" at "Kanlungan."

June 28, 2010

Jennylyn Mercado and Patrick Garcia Are Now Okay



Finally Jennylyn Mercado has allowed her baby daddy Patrick Garcia to see their son, Alex Jazz.

Some people see the handiwork of Jennylyn's current squeeze Dennis Trillo in this miraculous event but I see the hand of Jen's shrink in this. The doc has finally convinced (after two years) Jenn that it is good karma, not to mention good publicity, to forgive and forget.

All I can say about this momentous event is kudos to Jennylyn and her shrink for making Jenn appear sane for once.

Wonder where Patrick's mother is in all of these? This fuckery about paternity and financial support all came about courtesy of Patrick's matapobreng ina. Thanks to her big mouth and suspicious mind, we witnessed her son's embarrassment, Jennylyn's mind's unraveling and the phenomenal event of father meeting son at last.

James Yap and Kris Aquino: It's Over!


On the Buzz on Sunday, June 27, Kris Aquino said that on her part, her marriage to James Yap is over.

If you cried about your last appearance on your show more than the end of your marriage, then it is indeed over.

Kris did not say why she and James are ending their marriage but, of course, speculations abound.

#1 James asked Kris to help his sister, who is a nurse, to secure a US visa and a job abroad. Kris allegedly responded "we don't use connections to gain favors."

#2 - James wanted to visit a relative in Negros who is not a supporter of President Noynoy. Kris apparently got mad and did not permit James to go.

#3 - The relationship between James and Joshua, Kris' son with Phillip Salvador, has gotten cold, making Kris hate her husband even more.

According to people close to James, there is no third party involved and that the reason for the break up of their marriage is a family thing.

James' whorish ways aside, I think Kris, sooner or later, is bound to emasculate her boyfriend or husband.

A remember a blind item I read about a celebrity couple who is in a showroom buying a new car. A wife can't say "ito na lang ang piliin mo, ako naman ang magbabayad eh" and expect your husband to worship at your feet even if you are a martyr's daughter, a former president's daughter, a sitting president's youngest sister and a multi-millionaire in your own right.

The legal issues relating to their marriage is now being processed, so apparently the new baby and the church wedding Kris talked about shortly after her mom, Cory Aquino, died is also out the window?

I'm still on the fence on this issue. For now I'll just say James deserves better and Kris deserves better. In short, di sila bagay. They would be just right for other people. Maybe Kris and Chavit Singson?

June 22, 2010

Charice Will Be on Glee



Glee! Charice Pempengco will be in the cast of the third season of the popular musical comedy GLEE.

Charice will play a foreign exchange student and rival of Rachel.

I don't watch Glee (have not watched an entire episode) but will definitely tune in once Season 3 starts.

Last month rumor started, courtesy of Charice's local manager, that Charice has been cast on Glee. Girl shut that rumor down fast via Twitter.

Turns out the rumor is true but Charice's manager jumped the gun, displeasing the singer's US handler.

Lucky for the manager the deal pushed through. If not she would now be selling consumer product labels on the sidewalks near ABS-CBN.

June 21, 2010

Pambansang Kabit No More



Just as many of us have forgotten the existence of one Krista Ranillo, she out of the blue declares that "IT IS OVER" between her and the one who should not be named.

Well, Krista never spoke the name but we all know who she's referring to: Pambansang Kamao, Manny Paquiao.

The news is not news to me. I mean sooner or later one of them will call it quits. Krista has gotten what she wants out of that relationship. She's now a businesswoman in Los Angeles, California. And Manny, well he's moved on to fresher meat a few millions poorer.

I was all ready to hail Krista as the epitome of a gold digger next to Gretchen Barretto but she had to open her mouth and show what a dumb bitch really she is. With three words she called her relatives who came out of the wood work to defend her reputation liars and manggagamit. Hello Matt Ranillo and Suzette Ranillo!

But I have to give credit where credit is due. Krista may be dumb but she's a cockroach that will survive even the apocalypse. If we think she's somewhere lying in gutter crying her loss of income, think again. Krista is in a relationship and she's engaged to be married! Her new man is not just any guy. The guy does not have a wife and kid stashed somewhere and more importantly he owns a supermarket. Bravo, Krista!

Marian Rivera Snubs Mocha



At first I thought Marian Rivera has sworn off mocha flavored cakes, ice cream, coffee, etc. Is she crazy?!

But then I was shown the light and I found that the Mocha being referenced in the article is a person.

Then my next question was "Who is she? And after that I asked "Why do we care?"

After I googled the dumb fuck I learned that Mocha is a club singer whose claim to fame is declaring that she likes both the peen and the punane. In short she's bisexual. Okay. Then what?

NOBODY cares except the men's magazine readers and club goers who salivate on the thought of female on female action.

Now Mocha is telling Marian Rivera snubbed her inside an elevator on their way to a corporate show.

Mocha tells that Marian was her girl crush. "Was" as in former because she got her feelings hurt due to Marian mistaken her for trash inside the elevator.

As we all know not everything is what they appear. The story goes deeper than a random case of snubbing. You see, Mocha guested on Family Feud, the game show on GMA 7 hosted by Dingdong Dantes and kissed Marian's bf full on the lips. I would have kicked Mocha's ass if I were Marian.

But wait, Marian's manager has come out and said Marian said hello to Mocha. Ummm, an attention whore and a lie teller.

This press release is a major fail. Mocha, you are either a lesbian or a famewhore. You can't have have it both ways!

On to the next attention whore!

June 20, 2010

Yes It Is John Lloyd Cruz and Shaina Magdayao



And that noise you're hearing is Ruffa Gutierrez trying to hold her tears in lest the two leeches she calls pair of lips decide to walk out on her.

Now that John Lloyd has finally admitted that he and Shaina are "sila na," entertainment reporters can now cease from asking "kayo na ba?"

Not that it was obvious. John Lloyd and Shaina have been spotted in a bike shop together, in a mall and more recently in Singapore. Hindi naman halata, ano?

I don't know if reporters are just being obtuse accidentally on purpose or they just don't have anything interesting to ask anymore. I mean, the couple's are not exactly being discreet. Kailangan pa talagang i-confirm.

Ang mga katanungan na gaya ng "Kayo na ba?" ay parang lang tanong kay Gretchen Barreto na "silicone ba ang mukha mo?" Hindi na kailangang tanungin.

Actually, I'm kinda down that John Lloyd finally put the issue to rest because the next endless question now to them would be "Kailan kayo magpapakasal?" Ugh! So predictable!

Well, let's send the new couple good vibes. On second thought let's just toast them. I have high hopes for this couple because the "a couple that drinks together, stays together."

The Incestuous Relationship of Aljur Abrenica and Kris Bernal



I know actors and actresses are paid huge sums of money to do what they otherwise wouldn't do but this is too much.

Aljur Abrenica and Kris Bernal, the love team being peddled by GMA 7 in the "Last Prince" and other teleseryes before that, are not really into each other romantically. All they feel for each other is brother-sisterly love.

This is what Aljur Abrenica said. He considers Kris Bernal his baby sister. Si Kris Bernal sa tingin ko ang mas atat na atat kay Aljur. But apparently the feeling is mutual because Aljur is big brother to Kris. Blech! That was delivered by Kris with an ab-ful of sarcasm but Aljur is so busy denying everything, even that he denies everything, to notice.

Aljur does not strike me as someone articulate, even smart. He probably thought that's way nicer than saying "Kris does not make me twitch down there, not even a little." But did he thought of the implication? Let's cut him some slack, shall we? He has probably never read a book in his entire life. Scripts do not count.

Say what you will about professionalism but you don't kiss/embrace someone passionately in front of the camera, then turn around and say "she's my baby sister." Kadiri ka, boy!

The Last Prince is the last team up of Kris and Aljur. I hope this is the last time we hear of these two and their mutual brotherly-sisterly feelings for each other. Their loveteam and all the press releases about their blossoming relationship are faker than Gretchen Barreto's face. Just ask Pops Fernandez, Ruffa Gutierrez and Mikaela Bilbao.

June 17, 2010

How Lucky Are The Gutierrez Family?



The enemies of the Gutierrez family can't catch a break, can they?

Anabelle Rama can be found these days in her voodoo room doing thanksgiving rituals to her dolls. Why not? The Gutierrez family is on a winning streak - legal-wise.

The Reckless Imprudence resulting to homicide case filed against Richard Gutierrez filed by the widow of his assistant who died in a car crash with Richard last year has been dismissed by the DOJ.

You have a very powerful car made for speed and you can't take advantage of it, not with Metro Manila's traffic situation. What do you do? Turn a random Cavite road into an instant race track, that's what you do? Do you blame, Richard? And the DOJ secretaries past and present agree with him.

Not convinced yet that the Gutierrez are lucky bastards?

Then, Wilma Galvante, GMA 7's VP for Entertainment, could be jailed and pay Anabelle fucking Rama millions and millions of pesoses because the DOJ reversed its earlier decision dismissing the case.

I can't accept that the Gutierrez family is sooo lucky. I can't with them. I don't think the voodoo gods are smiling down at this family. I just can't. This leaves me with the question: Which influential person(s) is/are Anabelle, Ruffa or Raymond blowing!?

June 14, 2010

First Winner of Pilipinas Got Talent: Jovit Baldivino



Jovit Baldivino, the singer from Batangas, was hailed as the first grand winner of Pilipinas Got Talent, a larger-scale version of Show Time, Talentadong Pinoy and all other local talent shows out there.

From what I read from my favorite reading material, Jovit Baldovino is the enemy No 1 of Vilmanians across the archipelago because he sang for Vilma Santos' gubernatorial rival in Batangas.

Well, it came down to pay "allegedly." 8k from Ate Vi vs 50k from Edna Sanchez. Well, hello?! If you are a student/siomai vendor, your parents are jobless and you want all you siblings to finish school, saan ka pa?

And please, lay off the kid. He's literally kid because he's freaking 16 years old! He CANNOT vote. And please, Ate Vi won. So did Ralph Recto, okay?

When I read about the boycott, I felt a tiny twinge of sympathy for the poor kid. I mean, I got the impression that global Vilmanians and all Batanguenos are in on the boycott. I was like "See on another talent show." Anybody notice that contestants make the rounds of talent shows? That's how many local shows there are that have the same premise.

Anyway, now that I think about it was probably just one avid fan who emailed a tabloid reporter. Seriously, just one.

So instead of Jovit, the Vilmanian(s) switched to Markki Stroem, a Fil-Swiss contestant (I'm not sure. I don't really watch Pilipinas Got Talent.)

Ooh, scary. Jovit got 40% plus of the total text votes. The half-Pinoy guy got 1% plus - the contestant with the lowest text votes.

It was just one Vilmanian, I tell you!